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And that is that for our time in Hilmdel.
I truly wanted something more “epic” for Bognok’s final decree.
I tried such things as “Let us show these beasts what TRUE Nightmares are!” and “Let our children’s children sing songs of the day the dwarves of hilmdel thwarted an invasion!”
blerg
Any thoughts on something more… epic?
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I really like the “true nightmares” comment. 🙂 This is a great page!
How about borrowing a line from Gandalf? “Send these foul beasts back into the abyss.”
I agree with Nicole on the “true nightmares” comment. 😀
“War is upon Dreamland!” isn’t bad by itself, but Boggy says almost the same thing on the previous page: “‘Tis war, come to Dreamland!”
I favor Terry Pratchett’s dwarfs’ “Today is a good day for SOMEBODY ELSE to die!”
Obviously, “Let’s make sure history never forgets the name … ENTERPRISE!” is out of the question :-)0
I agree. “War is upon Dreamland!” is itself a very epic statement. Short, simple, true, and infinitely profound. I’d just recommend removing the redundant speech bubble from yesterday’s comic entirely. Give them a pause to take in everything they’re seeing.
Isn’t Mr. Rumblebottom a bit out of character here? It seems he’s about to join the fun instead of greeting the invaders with a pacifist dance.
As for Bognok’s epic call, ‘For Dreamland!’ would fit the previous panel better, I think. Provided, that is, that he’s still able to fight the urge to shout, ‘Baruk Khazad!’ 🙂
Cannons, battle, war… check. Wait: “Put down your ale”? This is serious!
Put down your ale is giggly.
“Time for drinking is past, tis time to fight.”
well, no one wants to spill any of it.
“War is upon dreamland” is good, “Let us show these beasts what true nightmares are” is great, but I really think they should put down their ale before they arm the cannons…
good idea. they don’t want to waste any perfectly good ale on shooting down nightmare beasts.
I don’t know why, but the first thing that popped into my head when I saw the first panel was, “Where’s his armpit hair?!?!” LOL
aw snap! when Bognok puts down his ale, IT’S GO TIME.
I like the “true mightmares” line.
I don’t know about epic, but I really love your “Put down the ale” command in the first panel. That is just grand.
Maybe in that last panel something like “Let’s show these beasts what dreams are made of” or “what dreamers can do”.
Oh and I’ll add, I think you should purposefully avoid mimicking or borrowing phrasing from others such as Gandalf or Pratchett. Mimicking to show homage to a great classic (like Alex’s As you wish line a while back) has it’s place and purpose. But over do it or put in where your own epic line works and it makes it look like you’re just a copy redoing a story that’s already been done. And DL is not just a sloppy copy. Plus it gets boring when all dwarf characters say the same stupid thing in every story. Bognok needs his own battle cry here. Which is probably one reason I really like that first panel’s lines.
A good dwarf would know how to fight a war AND drink his ale at the same time. Just saying. 😉
The last line is just like Bognok. Down to the nitty gritty. There’s a war going on. Not the time for speeches but rather for a one-liner, and then let’s get busy with staying alive.
Bognok : “#YOLO!”
*swings*
Free ale for all when we’ve won!
I agree. Either that or you should change the response on the previous page to the Centaur and say something like. Tis no cloud centaur, they are Nightmare!
Personally he needs to be a swingin and a bashin heads for the second part about “Let our Children sing…”
And technically, the comments should be in narrative order. First they put down their ale, then they take up weapons.
haha i was actually thinking that
I do too, especially since he already mentioned war.
I love the priorities. Arm the cannons is more important than putting down the ale first. lol 🙂
You don’t know dwarves. Anything that requires them to put down their ale IS serious. THAT should be his last line, right after the ‘war’ part.
Seeing as he just ordered his crew to load the cannons, how about “War is upon Dreamland! Fire at will!”
As an alternative, the monsters look to be about ready to storm the ship, so how about, “War is upon Dreamland! All hands repel boarders!”
They should probably put down their ale FIRST, then arm the cannons.
I think the common phrase “To Battlestations!” is always a good way of indicating the fight is about to start. I imagine the cannons should already be armed, anyway.
I admit I’m not fond of the second panel. Saying prepare twice just seems redundant.
Har! Those are some well-waxed pits!
Not redundant, but reenforcing. By repeating the command to prepare he’s emphasizing it to drive the point home.
“Put down your ale!” THAT is an entirely epic war command in its own right, purely for the fact that it needed to be said. Anything else is entirely superficial.
LonePaladin, you mean this?
‘Arm the cannons! Prepaire dwarves! Prepaire for battle! War is upon Dreamland!’
After a few seconds:
‘Put down your ale! It’s worse than I thought’
Never interrupt a Dwarf who is drinking. Wars have been started for less.
Maybe Sava should rename the current storyline as War in Dreamland-unless it spills over to our world.
Somebody needs to introduce the Camelpack backpacks to the dwarves… 😛
“Start chugging, men!” instead of put down the ale and “Show these ‘Nightmares’ the true meaning of terror!” because he already said it’s time for war before.
…I really need to get a gravitar.
“Let them sing songs of this day! When the Dwarves of Dreamland repelled the Nightmare Realm! When no one ran from their duty! When we all stood as one!
Or something like that?
I pictured one more (arrogant?) comment from Bognok. Something along the line of…
“Fight Dwarves! Not just for the survival of Dreamland, but for the honor of Hilmdel.”
Somehow, I have always pictured Bognok placing Hilmdel and honor above Dreamland.
why? i like to think it’s Kiwi saying “start chugging, men!”
Who’s to say that the comments aren’t in narrative order? Hmm?? 😉 I know I could certainly picture a certain pirate of Disney fame arming cannons with a flask in one hand. Why wouldn’t dwarves try the same? 😛
LOL! I didn’t notice…but I can guarantee I would have noticed if he actually did have hairy armpits. 😛 The Dreamland characters seem to have the hair growing tendencies of the Barbie doll collection. 🙂 Men have hair on their heads and faces, but none on their chests or underarms.
Think about it for a second. Did you see any underarm hair on Orion? Or on Alex when he was shirtless? 🙂 Maybe it only just triggered your attention because dwarves are so notoriously hairy. 😛
While I definitely liked your idea about “let’s show them true nightmares,” I think that what you have here is fine as it is. You don’t really need something that comes across as “epic” when it’s pretty obvious that there’s an epic battle about to begin (one ship vs a horde of beasties is epic or suicide…and I choose to believe it will be epic). Besides…as someone else already pointed out, Bognok doesn’t seem the type for “epic speeches.” He’s more to the point than that. 🙂
put your ale down is like the British “Put the kettle on” — this means Business!
Hah , this!
I kind of like the line from an old Green Lantern Comic (I’d have to dig it out) but K’ryssma says “If we die, we die for the greatest cause of all. If they die, all the better!”
What a bunch of warmongers! Clearly the nightmare realm is just sending a peace delegation, just like Dreamland sending a battleship for peace.
Nightmare realm already had spies come deep in their realm so of course they are cautious.
Here’s a few:
“It is a good day to kill nightmares”
“Put down your ale, we’ll need all of it when we sing our victory!”
A little more violent:
“Put down your ale, we drink blood tonight!”
I like that “true nightmare” comment, though. It sounds epic enough.
How about the most perfect dwarf expression: “They won’t get our ALE!”, or “For all the GOLD!”?
How about the comment that it would be time to sing? And that suddenly all those dwarfs start to sing a war-song, which frightens the hell out of all the Nightmare beasts? Something about ‘Let our Axes sing of Victory?’
Just thoughts.
Just a little footnote:
The naval term is guns. On land do they become cannons. I’m sure the Dwarves would use the proper naval term.
I would change what Bognok says to “Prepare for broadside! Grapeshot. Load the guns!”
Footnote 2: When use on land, grapeshot is called canister shot.